Hanging Out in the Summer of 1956

My Summer as a Waitress. 

After I finished my freshman year in college at Gardner-Webb, I was looking for a summer job, and there were no jobs in Shelby.  By that time I wanted to do something other than pick cotton.  My uncle's wife in Statesville said they were looking for a waitress at Gray's Restaurant in Statesville where she worked and that I could live with them or with my Grandmother.  I guess Daddy must have taken me to Statesville and I applied and became a waitress at Gray's Restaurant.  At the time this was one of the best restaurants in Statesville.

Waitresses were required to wear a white uniform so I went out and bought ONE uniform.  To save money I was planning on wearing it each day and washing it each night and have it ready to wear the next day.  That's what I did.  As soon as I got home, at my Grandmother's house where I was staying, I would change clothes and wash the uniform.  By morning it was dry because it was hot in Grandma's house with no air conditioning.

I usually worked the morning shift which began at 6:00am if I remember correctly.  Of course, I had no car and would walk the mile from Connor Street down Front Street to South Center Street to the restaurant.  Two free meals came with the job, so I would leave at 5:00am and walk in the early dawn hours to have breakfast before I began my morning shift.  I got off work at 3:00pm and then I could eat another meal before I left.

In those days, waitresses didn't have a large tray to carry the dishes to the tables of the diners.  We had to learn to carry four plates at one time if we had a large order.  I can't believe I learned to do that. But I did and I didn't once drop a plate.

This is how I felt. Though as I recall I never had to carry a plate on my head. 

The early morning shift was usually easy, and Jay Huskins, who was then editor of the Statesville Record and Landmark came in every weekday morning to get just a cup of coffee.  I was serving him, we chatted, and when he learned that I was working to make money for college, he began tipping me $1.00 every single day.  That was a big tip for a 20 cent cup of coffee. For most orders of just coffee, I didn't even get a tip. I missed him on weekends.

I had a lot of freckles on my face, and the owner whose name I can't recall. I thought I would never forget that, the way he teased me all the time.  He would say, "She's got freckles on her, BUT,  (he paused here) I love her just the same." and I would always blush.  I could feel my face get red hot.  I never got used to it.  He was a good boss though, and he and his family would come in on Sundays after church to eat, and sometimes I would be the one to serve them. 

Gray's Restaurant was the stop for the Greyhound Bus Schedule in Statesville, and a bus came in around noontime when we were already rather busy with customers.  People would get off the bus, come in to order in a hurry, I think they had only about 30 minutes before the bus would depart.  I dreaded that, it was so hectic, and the bus customers usually did not leave a tip.  Regarding tips, I just want to say that since I experienced life as a waitress, I ALWAYS tip generously whenever I eat out. Brooks now you know why I tip the way I do.

Each day when I got back to Grandma's I would empty out my pockets on her kitchen table and count my money.  She was always so happy when I made a lot of tips.  I offered to share my tips with her since I was boarding at her place, but she would not hear of it. Bless her heart.  It was great for me to spend time with my Grandma.

I don't think I made much money that summer, but it was a great experience.  An experience that would benefit any young person growing up.  Grace, maybe you would like to try it sometime before you finish college.  Waitresses in some of the Chapel Hill restaurants probably make pretty good money these days.

I saved almost all that I made that summer, but I did splurge on getting a photograph made at a professional photography studio.  The same studio that my mother had had a photo made when she was about 19, the age I was at the time. Mama had grown up in Statesville.   Not the same photographer I am certain.

Me at 19 in the summer of 1956.

Mama, your Great Grandmother at 19, 1920

When summer was over, I had matured a lot and returned home eager to begin my second year at Gardner-Webb College.


Love, love, love, GrandPat
April 24, 2020

Hanging Out At Gardner-Webb My Freshman Year

The Gardner-Webb Yearbook my Freshman Year. 

Dear Grands:     I’ve decided to write to you about my first year in college, and as you will see it was quite different from what yours have been and Grace what yours will be come September.

When I graduated from high school in 1955, I knew I didn’t want to go very far away to college, yet I did want to stay on campus.  Gardner-Webb Junior College (it was a two-year college then) was perfect, only twelve miles from home.  Shirley McSwain a Lattimore classmate and I were going to room together.  So at least I would know one person. Looking back, I think I had led a rather sheltered life and was perhaps shy. 

My photo from the Anchor my freshman year. 

Although I had some scholarship money, I knew I needed to work on campus while I was there to help defray my expenses.  My first work assignment was serving in the cafeteria which meant I had to eat early with other students working there before the cafeteria opened for the student body.  My best friends that I had made ate later, and I missed eating with them.  Homesickness had already set in.  I remember President Elliott saying in Chapel that it spoke well of us if we were homesick. I thought “that really speaks well of me then.”   So I called home on the one payphone that was in HAPY Dorm.  I tried to be brave when I talked to my parents and then I burst out crying saying I didn’t want to work in the cafeteria.  They told me I could quit, but I knew I needed to work.   

Mrs. Dorothy Hamrick, the Registrar, was someone I knew so I thought maybe she could perhaps find me another campus job.  Sure enough, I got switched to the Library, a job I loved.  I had to go in early and open the library before the Librarian came in and check out books, and shelve books.  Often we were not busy in the morning so I could actually study while I worked.  Now I could eat meals with my friends.  I was still homesick, but not so terribly.

But as time passed, I began to love college.  Our rules were very strict though compared to today.  We had to have lights out by 11:00 pm, we could only leave campus on Saturday nights and Sunday.  If we dated on Sunday nights we had to go to Sunday Night Service at Boiling Springs Baptist Church on campus.  Of course, we had to be back in our dorm by 11:00, and perhaps 10:00 on Sunday night.  We had to sign out on cards and then if our cards were still in the signout box after hours the Dean of Women would call us in and we would get demerits for being late. 

When we had to go across campus to the gym for our physical education classes, we would have to wear a raincoat over our gym outfit so that our legs wouldn’t show.  Now that is pretty strict. 

I had gone to college thinking I would major in English.  At the beginning of the year, we were given tests of different kinds, and I remember one of my tests indicated that Law would be a good choice for me to pursue.   I had never heard of a female lawyer, but looking back, I think I would have enjoyed law.  But after I took freshman biology with Dr. Paul Stacey, I knew then that biology was for me, and I did choose a major that proved the right one for me. 

I made the basketball team, because of my GPA I was selected as a Marshal, and in the Spring was elected President of Stroup Dorm for the Sophomore year and thus would serve on the Student Government for the upcoming year. The induction for members of the Student Government was held in Chapel (we had required Chapel and because we had assigned seats alphabetically, Dorothy Hamrick would come up the aisles checking off those absent.)  As we were inducted we had to “swear” that we as leaders, would follow the rules, would set a good example, and would uphold the values of the College.

 Now in the spring, the guys on campus would go swimming over at the Broad River where there was a sandy beach.  Of course, this was off-limits for female students.  Near the end of the year, on a pretty summer day, I happened to have my boyfriend’s car, and I and about four of my friends decided we would drive over and sunbathe at that beach.  We had a marvelous time as I remember. 

But the next day I and my partners in crime who were also elected to the Student Government were called in by the Dean of Students.  One of the maintenance workers had been out at the River and had seen us, females, out there, and turned us in for being off-limits.  I was so humiliated because we had to get back up in Chapel and renew our vows that we would uphold the rules and values of the College.  At least we didn’t get kicked off the Student Government.

I was a bit sad at graduation that year because some of the good friends that I had made were sophomores and were graduating.  I did enjoy serving as a Marshal at the graduation that morning though, and when I got home, I was pictured in the Shelby Daily Star with my white dress and sash as I was about to lead the Faculty in the processional. 

Photo from my scrapbook of picture in Shelby Daily Star. 

Love you very much, GrandPat

April 23, 2020

Hanging Out with My Grands During the Covid 19

A Letter to My Grandchildren

A Typical Day at Home during the “Stay at Home” Covid 19

I’m going to go through what would be a typical day during these days of Covid 19 so that I can remember when it’s all over, and so that you, my grandchildren,  and perhaps my great grands will know what it has been like.

I still like to get up at about the same time each day 7:00 to 8:30 depending upon when I when to bed.

Feed Maggie, take meds, let Maggie out, put in “ears” (hearing aids), drops in eye, get dressed.

Eat breakfast usually cereal, oatmeal, or yogurt or sometimes toast with peanut butter or guacamole

Run dishwasher (if full), wash clothes (if needed), straighten up kitchen, plug-in cell phone to charge it

Think about what I’ll prepare for dinner (lunch is just yogurt, or a sandwich, or soup, or something light) Sometimes this involves my checking to see what’s in the pantry and freezer and what needs to be used first.  Prepare anything that needs to be done in advance.

Check my email, answer mail, make telephone calls to family, especially my sister, and friends (I try to call PJ every other day) By this time it will be at least 10:30 or 11:00.

Work on some indoor or outdoor projects depending on weather and my inclinations for the day.  I much prefer doing something outside.  Weed my garden, trim shrubbery, sweep off patios, Because I have lymphedema in my left arm (breast cancer in 1990) I am not supposed to do heavy yard work and I have a yardman that comes about once a month.  Indoor projects will be housecleaning chores.  I miss Bea our wonderful person who kept our house immaculate. (Bea retired before this Covid 19 arrived, and my friend Boguska had been helping me with cleaning occasionally. I am in need of a regular cleaning service and that is one of the first things I shall do when this is all over.) Sometimes I get a real inspiration and tackle cleaning out a closet or straightening the pantry or the freezer, and of course, eventually, the fridge has to be cleaned. I have discovered that I really detest housework, except cooking.

I read what little there is in the N & O and then do some reading in general.  I find that I am now reading the New Yorker each week from cover to cover, and I usually have a book in progress that I am reading. I am currently rereading E.O. Wilson’s book Naturalist, his autobiography. Wilson was a friend of Dan’s when they both served on NSF panels in Washington. I remember Dan telling me about a joke that Wilson once told.  “A man is traveling and at the airport, he sees a hole in the wall with a sign that says ‘Your wife away from home’ The man decides to try it out, and ouch he gets a button sewn on his penis.”  Did I just share this joke? Why yes I did. Blush, blush.

Then I also do some writing either in the morning or in the afternoon.  Right now I am writing in the morning and it is 11:00.  Since I started writing letters to you, that keeps me doing something that I enjoy, in fact, writing you is really getting me through this cabin fever.  It’s fun for me to have to think hard and jog my memory about things.  There are certain things that have stuck in my mind for years, thankfully I can recall most of them. I am lucky that way and am glad that I have an opportunity to get some of them in print before I become demented.

Lunch will be something light between 12:00 and 2:00. 

I usually have a cup of hot tea either midmorning or early afternoon.  Dan introduced me to drinking hot tea, and I can have my tea and remember him.  It sure would be wonderful to have Dan with me during these days though.  I wonder if we would have begun bickering if we were cooped up together for days and days?  Maybe a little, but I’m sure not for long.

The afternoon consists of chores, doing my exercise, reading, or writing or sometimes playing WWF although I’ve taken a break from that for a while.  Maybe calling friends. I always take Maggie for a walk in the afternoon unless the weather is very bad, and she goes in and out during the day to play in the fenced backyard. By 4:00 I start getting things ready for supper, by 6:00 I will have supper ready.  These days I eat while I watch Judy Woodruff on PBS news for an hour.  This is the only news I try to watch or hear.  The news is so disheartening!!

 During the week Patrick comes over at 7:00 and we watch Jeopardy together and we play along.  He usually beats me because he is so well-read and he watches a lot of the History Channel, and he has a much better memory and is faster off the mark in answering that I am.  He is really good.  I told him he should take the test to try to get on Jeopardy himself, but he would be too shy to go. Interestingly I never was fond of Jeopardy until this “stay at home.” Then we may watch something else if there is something worthwhile like Vivian Howard.

I usually spend an hour or two in the evenings paying bills, updating my Quicken accounts, and trying to get my study in order.  My study is definitely not in order right now.  Maybe more reading or more writing or more calling friends.  Oh, I forgot, I do spend time on Facebook (too much time) and Instagram and usually take some photos of whatever during the day. 

Shower and bedtime between 10:00 and 12:00.  If 10:00 I usually have time to read in bed or sometimes I do watch Brian Williams from 11:00 to 12:00. 

This is kind of a stream of consciousness (I think. Omg that makes me think of James Joyce and Ulysses which I could never finish.  I should get that out and try again) or just what was going through my mind this morning.

Love you, GrandPat xoxoxo

April 15, 2020 (And I have already sent in my income taxes. Yeah.)

Fifth Grade at Lattimore Elementary for GrandPat

Fifth Grade Class Picture
This must have been in cool weather, we are wearing sweaters.  Front row, far right am I. 

Fifth Grade

Letters to My Grandchildren:

Grade 1947-48

Our classroom that year was on the second floor looking out to the east and over the playground.  Our fifth-grade teacher was new to Lattimore—it was Mrs. Nota Whatley, and she was from Alabama.  She was a very tall lady and a kind teacher with a marked southern accent.  I remember we were studying the Catawba Indians and she pronounced it Cat’a’baw with the accent on the Cat’, and I knew it was pronounced Ca-taw’-ba , and I almost laughed out loud at her pronunciation.  I went home and told my parents, but they said I should not correct her.  I was glad when we stopped studying about those Indians because I was having to mispronounce their names with the emphasis on the Cat’.  I was afraid she would correct me if I pronounced them correctly.   After that whenever we visited my Grandmother in Statesville and had to cross the Catawba River, I would say this is the Cat’-a-baw River, and we would all laugh. 

Martha Mason was supposed to be in our room that year, but she told me many years later why she wasn’t.  She went into the room with this new teacher with a funny last name and a funny accent so she decided she would go up to the third floor to the other fifth-grade class.  As she was bounding up the steps, along came Mr. Padgett, our principal.  He asked her where she was going and when she explained where and why he let her change to the other class.  Martha admitted to me that she had made a mistake because Mrs. Whatley was the better teacher as she found out later.

I had my appendix removed during this school year—in the spring of the year as I recall.  Anesthesia back then was Ether administered with a mask over your face.  I felt like I was suffocating!  As I was drifting off I could imagine a large saw as big as a Ferris wheel coming toward me.  I woke up in my room with my parents there, and my roommate was another little girl about my same age who had had an appendectomy too, but several days earlier than I.  As we chatted she told me the worst thing was when they removed the adhesive tape from your belly.  She had already endured that.  I recall my whole belly was covered in tape, and I kept dreading when they were ripped off.  Sure enough, it was extremely painful.  Ouch! Ouch! Ouch!

The one bright spot of that appendectomy was when Mrs. Whatley came to see me in the hospital and brought me this beautiful purple flower.  I thought it was the prettiest flower I had ever seen.  It was a Fuchsia plant, and that plant and her visit was the highlight of that hospital stay. To this day a Fuchsia plant reminds me of Mrs. Whatley, a teacher I dearly loved.

While I was in the hospital, I missed the yearly achievement tests so I had to make up the tests during our recesses (play periods) when I returned to school. During one such recess, I was taking the spelling component part of the test of fifty words that Mrs. Whatley was calling out as I wrote them.  Spelling was so easy for me, and I was sailing right along writing down the words as she called them out, when suddenly she called out “who”.  My mind went blank, and I couldn’t for the life of me think of how to spell “who”.  I left it blank.  After the last word was called out, I asked her to go back and repeat the one that I had left blank.  She said “who” and I remembered how to spell it, and I thought how could I possibly have forgotten that word---she must have wondered too.

I began taking piano lessons this year from Mrs. Selma Withrow who taught in a small room on the third floor of our building.  I had permission to leave class for a half-hour each week to go take the piano lesson.  Piano was not my interest, in fact, music was not my forte.  More about me and music in another letter.

*Of these thirty students, there are only seven I recognize as being in my graduating class.  Of course, there were students in another fifth-grade class some of whom would have been in our senior class. Some children would have moved away, many others would have failed a grade or dropped out, and other children would have moved into our school district and entered our class after fifth grade. 

Easter Eggs and Easter

Letters to my Grandchildren: Easter When I was Young

As a young child, I remember we always dyed eggs using Paas Egg Colors.  We mixed the dye in with water and vinegar, I still sometimes think of Easter when I am using vinegar.  A dozen was the number we usually dyed.  I remember there was a wax pencil with the set of dyes that we could use to write on the eggs before we dyed them.  Since there were only two of us, I suppose I would hide them and my little sister Martha hunted for them, and vice versa.  Once Betty Jo was our neighbor, there would be three of us to hide/hunt for the eggs.  Hiding and hunting probably continued long past Easter until the eggs were probably a bit on the rank side. New Easter Baskets were out for us on Easter Morning usually filled with candy eggs filled with marshmallows (they were awful).

Even in my 80s I still enjoy dying eggs, but I haven't done so this year.  Once when we were in Shelby for Easter, I went over to Lattimore on Saturday night before Easter to Martha Mason's, set up a card table, and dyed eggs as Martha watched and gave me instructions on what colors to use.  That was one of my many fun visits over the years with Martha.

Easter Sunday I always had a new outfit to wear to church.  As a teenager, when I began wearing hats to church (That was the style back in the 50s.) I would always have a new hat, and I enjoyed seeing what others were wearing.  Once I remember when I was sitting in the Youth Choir and looking out over the congregation, Dr. and Mrs. Hunt from Lattimore, brought their five little girls all decked out in their Easter outfits. The seven of them took up almost an entire row.   I thought they were adorable.  Mrs. Hunt's family was from the Double Springs Church community so I guess she was visiting with her family because I don't remember the Hunts being members at Double Springs.

Easter 1955 was special for me.  I was a senior in high school and it was the first Easter I had a serious boyfriend.  Back then, girls who had serious boyfriends would get a corsage for Easter from their boyfriend.   So I proudly went to Church that Easter sporting my very first corsage from a boy,  but my mother had made corsages for me when I was in piano recitals as a child.

This Easter, April 2020, is sad for me because I am separated from my family, and usually, I would see them over the Easter Holidays.  The Covid 19 virus and the "stay at home" orders are making Easter unusual for a lot of people.  Let's hope we will be able to have a normal Easter in 2021.

p.s I  made little Easter treats for the children on our street, and I hid them in their yards last night for them to find this morning.  Fun, fun, fun for me playing Easter Bunny!